Hats off to the real-life time travelers, also known as ‘long-haul truckers.’

May 25, 2018

Wendy Parker

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Time travel is real.

Eastern Standard Time is the slot I was born and raised in. I was 5 years old the first time my family traveled beyond the boundaries of EST. I couldn’t tell time very well when I was 5, and I still can’t tell time when I’m out of my regular zone.

It’s an embarrassing affliction. Since I’m already embarrassed, I’ll go ahead and admit I thought EST and ESP were the same thing until I was about 15 years old. I mean, it made sense. ESP gives you powers to see the future, and Eastern Standard Time is the future of  Pacific Coast Time, right?

Bear with me.

We’ve spent the last month traveling between time zones on an almost daily basis. I gave up trying to decide if it was time to eat lunch or go to bed in New Mexico. I have no idea what sorcery George uses to keep all the times straight, but I suspect black magic.

Somewhere in Albuquerque, we took a left turn, and I had a time melt-down.

I asked George, “What time is it? I think I’m late for a meeting call.”

He’s used to my frantic outbursts. He also knows that I’m time-challenged.

“It’s 7 a.m. in Albuquerque. That’s Mountain Time, and its two hours behind Eastern Time. Where’s the meeting?”

“On the phone.”

“Uh, yeah, I got that. Where are the people having the phone meeting you’re probably late to?”

“Indiana.”

“Indiana has two time zones.”

This is the part where I screamed and gave up.

Trucking is hard enough without having to manipulate time zones like a magical wizard.

I’d take my hat off to the real-life time travelers, but I lost it somewhere in Missouri, trying to use the bill as a sundial, so I could figure out what time it was.

I have so much respect for the long-haul drivers who can adjust to driving from the past to the future, and vice-versa. I’m so thankful you do it, because if it were up to me, nothing would be on time. Just ask my editors, who happen to be on Central Standard Time, and have probably already started telling me my deadlines are an hour earlier than they actually are. (Editor’s note: We actually tell her two hours ahead and hope for the best. JJ)

Time travel is hard.

Wendy Parker

Wendy Parker has covered the trucking industry since 2012 after she says she “lost my mind and decided to climb inside my husband’s big truck to travel with him as an over-the road, long-haul trucker.” Her unique writing style that ranges from biting satire to investigative journalism coupled with her unbridled passion for fighting round out a wildly talented stable of writers.